by Don MacPherson
THE NAIL #1
"The Last American Virgin"

Mildly Recommended (5/10)

The Nail #1

Dark Horse Comics
Writers: Rob Zombie & Steve Niles
Artist: Nat Jones
Colors: Jay Fotos
Letters: Blambot
Editor: Shawna Gore

Price: $2.99 US

I'm a Steve Niles fan. There's no denying it. Though he specializes in horror, he brings a wonderful diversity to that genre. For more glowing comments, check out this week's array of Quick Critiques, in which I review Aleister Arcane. Just don't look to this review for Niles accolades. His collaboration with rocker Rob Zombie -- which combines the pro wrestling genre with the traditional slasher picture -- leaves a lot to be desired. The characters are almost all completely distasteful, and the story and art are just too damn gratuitous from beginning to end. The exaggerated qualities of the line and color art clearly show a Spawn influence, and that works against a more grounded tone that the script tries to foster later in the book.

A couple of... somethings stalk innocent victims in the countryside around Devil's Hills, and they're riding choppers. Their latest prey is a nomadic family setting out for a camping vacation before the patriarch of the group has to begin the summer pro-wrestling circuit. He's known as the Nail, for his use of nails in his act. He's a middle-aged wrestler who should be reaching the end of his career, but he's known nothing else his entire life. Well, he's about to know what real violence and mutilation is like.

The art on this book is appropriately dark given the tone the creators are trying to achieve, but at times, it's too dark. The action in the wrestling scene isn't clear at all. And the dark, deep colors don't help either. Furthermore, the monstrous antagonists, rather than boasting an intimidating look. I mean... undead bikers? Jones's style here reminds me of a cross between the styles of Tom Mandrake and John Higgins. The two-page splash early on and biker designs definitely put me in mind of Todd McFarlane's line of comics, but that exaggeraed approach works against the more familial tone the core of this issue focuses on. Furthermore, the supporting cast character designs are rather ordinary and don't set the two women in the Nail's family apart distinctly enough.

I hate pro wrestling, so this book had that going against it from the start. It's not a problem with the writing, per se; it's just that I'm not a part of the target audience here. The macho bravado that's an inherent part of this wrestling thing and the over-the-top stunts to make thins seem more bloody than they really are just strike me as silly.

I could say the same thing about a number of elements in the book. The method of murder depicted in the opening scene is not only cliched, but it's actually rather laughable. Furthermore, so many of the characters are unsavory. The victims in the opening scene are painfully stupid so one is actually relieved when horror befalls them. And though there's a hint of intellect in the wrestling family, they're just so rough around the edges that it's hard to relate to them or even like them. We really don't get an indication why this man and his family have embraced such an unconventional and dangerous lifestyle.

Note: This comic book was not among this week's new releases.


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all contents © & TM Don MacPherson, Randy Lander, except columns which are © & TM their authors